Accountability Group

For almost 10 years we have been regularly meeting together as an accountability group. Each time we go through set questions that reflect the kind of life with Jesus we want to pursue, from Bible reading and confession, to most importantly, openly sharing how we see God in our lives that week. While the goal is to help shape our spiritual practices and mind of Christ, the transforming part of it really has been in the practice of vulnerability with others and God: bearing to one another where we are struggling, insecure, and where we see the beauty of God. It’s truly a healing and life-changing practice. Having others speak truth over you regularly, pray for you and know you in deep, soul-like ways. This both rewires your brain to regularly look and see God in the ordinary, and is one of the most profound experiences of being taken in and loved no matter what you bring to the table. Each week is a practice of love and in doing so, it radically changes you. It shapes you, calls you higher, and provides the kind of deeply-known community that can speak truth when you’ve forgotten in, remind you of Gods faithfulness in your past, and speak in their own unique gifts and heart into your life. 

This practice is for those who desire to be deeply, deeply known by others. It is for those who feel stuck in patterns or thoughts and can’t break out. It’s for those who just desire desperately to have more of Jesus. 

These are recommendations for creating a group: 

• Find The Right People: Look for mutual desire, not necessarily mutual interests. You don’t have to start as friends or have things in common. The most important thing is people who are willing to lean in, be vulnerable, and want to grow with Jesus with the same desire you do. 

• More than 2, Less than 5: We found our sweet spot to be 3. It gives multiple points of views, offers different gifts and capacities into a situation, and still gives space for people to dive deep each week. 

• Meet Regularly + Consistently: the consistency of showing up will change you. It’s here where you experience not just real accountability but a real experience of love. Choosing others (and being chosen) over and over again is a healing experience. Pushing into this for years has been the fruit, not just a right-away change. 

• Be Real: Being honest and vulnerable is the only way you can grow and be truly seen. Show up even on the times you don’t feel like it. You’re not ready to talk, you’re hurting, tired, angry… one of the most healing experiences is stepping into a place as the not-so-great version of yourself and still being loved. 

• Set a Time: It is exhausting to plan a time that works for people each week, so set a time and stick to it. At first, this felt, very hard. But to gain anything in your life requires sacrifice and eventually it just become a habit. 

• Everyone Should Answer: Don’t skip questions or someone even if they don’t feel like they have anything to say, especially as you’re establishing your group. Sometimes forcing yourself to say “I don’t know” or “I’m not sure” helps reveal where God is inviting you to lean in more. It also makes sure that everyone gets space and time to be seen without time being capitalized. 

The Questions that we started with:

How have you sensed God’s presence during the past week? 

Have you taken enough time to be alone with God in prayer?

Have you received a specific answer to your prayers?

How did you do in your Bible reading this week?

What has God been speaking to you through His Word this week?

How can you respond to this?

Did you express a loving and forgiving attitude towards others?

Have you remained pure sexually?

Have you lacked integrity in your financial dealings or coveted something which does not belong to you?

Have you taken enough time to rest?

Do you need to confess any other sin?

Did you pray for your non-Christian friends?

Did you share Jesus with someone (in word or deed)?

What worries or other issues are you currently facing?

What would you like to pray about?